In this week's episode, I speak with James, who has been a member of Overcome Pornography for Good and has been coached by Kat. Kat also joins us on this episode. James's story is a great example of how it is never too late to try something new, and what he has achieved in the program has been transformational.
James had been viewing porn on and off since he was 11 years old, which adds up to over 40 years. He had always labeled himself as an addict and had heavy thoughts around his pornography use. However, with the approach we use in Overcome Pornography for Good, everything started to change for James.
Tune in this week to discover what is possible when you stop labeling yourself as an addict. James shares the beliefs he changed around his pornography use and what it means, and dives into all the work we did in Overcome Pornography for Good that helped him quit porn and move forward with his life.
If you’re ready to do this work and start practicing unconditional...
Overwhelm is one of those all-encompassing uncomfortable emotions that makes us feel frozen. Quitting porn requires some miserable growth periods, which means overwhelm will naturally be a part of your experience. The good news though is that overwhelm is not a problem, and it’s easier to make progress if you lean into it.
When it comes to quitting porn, sometimes, you might feel overwhelmed by the process and skills you need to learn. You might wonder how you’ll find time to do it all, or where to even begin. Maybe you notice that your porn habit is a result of trying to escape overwhelm altogether.
To help you navigate your overwhelm, this week, I’m sharing four strategies for breaking the cycle of overwhelm. You’ll hear what typically happens if you resist overwhelm, why you’re not actually at the mercy of this emotion, and the importance of approaching learning new skills with tiny baby steps along the way.
If you’re ready to do...
There is so much pressure on both parties in a relationship when it comes to one spouse’s porn use. Women have been taught to believe something terrible about themselves if their husbands look at porn, and men equally have a specific kind of pressure society expects them to carry.
If you and your partner are committed to healing and building connection, but it seems to be putting you both in a tailspin, listen in. Lindsay Poelman is a life coach focused on helping people who are struggling with their spouse’s porn use and an expert in trauma-informed coaching, and she’s here this week to shed light on what relationship spirals mean, and how to get out of them.
Join us on this episode as Lindsay shares how relationship spirals have a lot to do with our individual conditioning. You’ll hear why we have to first understand the context of our conditioning to untangle our relationship spirals, and how you’re both allowed to create a safe space for your own...
When it comes to your own healing and quitting porn, there are so many opinions, thoughts, and ways to do it that can be offered to you out there. That’s why this might be one of the most important episodes that I ever share with you.
You can be led and guided by other people in your life, whether it’s loved ones, a coach, or mentor. But the truth is no one has all the answers for you. No one is the ultimate authority of your healing, no one has your intuition, and no one else can be your savior.
Join me this week to hear why you have everything you need inside of you to heal and quit porn for good. I’m showing you how we’re conditioned to believe the authority lives outside of us, and why it’s vital to recognize nothing and no one is above questioning.
If you’re ready to stop using porn for good, you need to sign up for my free upcoming training, Overcoming Porn for Good Without the Fear and Shame Tactics. You’ll learn how to...
No matter how old you are, you can quit porn. My guest today is proof that it's possible. Jeff is 75 years old and had struggled with pornography since he was 14 years old. He had tried to quit many times over the years, but none of those attempts resulted in permanent change.
Like so many of you listening, Jeff used porn as a way to escape his emotions and it led to struggles, challenges, and stress in his life and in his relationships. However, after going through my program, he can now say that he has no desire to use porn.
Tune in this week to hear Jeff’s story of using porn for over 60 years to no longer having the urge or desire to look at it. Jeff shares why his attempts to quit over the years didn’t work, how it affected his relationship with his wife, and how what he learned in the program changed everything. Jeff says he’s now free to live his life the way he wants to, and I want you to know that that freedom is possible for you too!
Many of us have received the conditioning that men are typically the sexual ones in a relationship and that they have an insatiable sexual need that has to be satisfied. In the context of a monogamous relationship, the responsibility to fulfill that sexual need falls on the partner, but this belief often doesn’t create great results.
To dive into this topic, I’m talking to sex coach Amanda Louder. I often recommend Amanda to my clients so she is no stranger to the Overcome Pornography for Good program. She’s also the host of the Sex for Saints podcast, and she helps women learn to embrace their sexuality and love their sex life.
Listen in this week to hear why we have to reframe the belief that your spouse should fulfill your sexual needs. Amanda is sharing where this belief comes from, what you miss out on when you believe this messaging, and her top tips for what actually creates the best, most fulfilling sexual relationship.
If you’re ready to do...
Many of us were taught to be terrified of our sexuality. It’s something we don’t talk about openly, and maybe you think of it as evil or dangerous. However, the truth is sexuality and urges are something you have, so does everyone else and they live with us forever.
We spend our lives trying to control our sexual urges by building fences around them and hoping they stay contained. When our urges inevitably try to break through the fence, we yell, shame them, and continue to build more fences. But this isn’t the answer.
Listen in this week to discover how to control your sexual urges. I’m showing you how your sexuality can actually be your friend and companion, and why you don’t have to tame it by resorting to locking it away or hating it.
If you’re ready to do this work and start practicing unconditional commitment toward quitting your porn habit, sign up to work with me!
Welcome to another What’s Possible episode. These are special episodes where I bring on amazing clients who have overcome pornography and let them share their stories. It’s one thing to learn the tools and begin applying them, but another to hear from people who have actually done it.
Thomas is a member of Overcome Pornography For Good and he struggled with porn on and off for 40 years. He decided he was ready to quit and did the work with our coach, Kat. He’s here to share his story and hopefully, impart his belief that you too can do it.
Tune in this week to hear Thomas’s struggle with pornography use, and how his one-on-one work with Kat has transformed all areas of his life. He’s offering the tools that made the biggest difference to his porn use, how he made the decision to commit to the work, and how he’s now showing up as a serene person who is more intentional with his time both at work and at home.
When you feel shame around having viewed pornography, blame is never far behind. Whether you blame yourself and experience more shame or you find someone else to blame for what you’re going through, this is a trap many of my clients are stuck in when they first come to me. In this episode, I’m showing you how to break out of this shame-blame spiral.
Blame is often an effect of shame and the way to stop shaming yourself isn’t to blame others to move out of it. There is always a more true and compassionate way of looking at these circumstances and I’m showing you how in this episode.
Tune in this week to start the work of escaping the shame-blame trap. I’m sharing why, even though it’s difficult to talk yourself out of shame, you can move through it with compassion for yourself, without resorting to blaming others.
If you’re ready to do this work and start practicing unconditional commitment toward quitting your porn habit, ...
This week, I’m sharing a replay of one of the most important episodes of this podcast to date all about one of the foundational things you need to understand if you want to quit viewing porn and never go back to it: urges.
People come to me absolutely terrified of their urges, believing that they’re totally unable to resist them. But the truth is, urges are just sensations in our bodies and we don’t have to indulge them. Just like toddlers throwing a tantrum, they aren’t actually dangerous, they won’t hurt you, and they’re not a problem.
Tune in this week to discover why you don’t have to push your urges away or try to silence them. In fact, I’m encouraging you to start welcoming them in as much as you can. Like any new skill, there will be failures along the way. But when you are no longer scared of your urges, I promise, you’ll be able to approach them in a way that will completely change your life.