Episode 87: Worthiness

Uncategorized Sep 12, 2022

So many people have been taught a side of the story around worthiness that is holding them back. However, the more we learn about worthiness, the easier it becomes to access and step into our own. So, this episode is a reminder of the most helpful emotion you can create in combatting the shame that leads to people viewing pornography.

Shame and worthiness are big topics, but they both come from our thoughts. We feel shame because we’re thinking shameful thoughts about ourselves. Pretty simple, right? Well, as hard as it might be to believe right now, creating a sense of worthiness doesn’t come from our circumstances, our past, or our actions, it’s a result of the thoughts we think.

Tune in this week to discover everything you need to know about being worthy and creating the feeling of worthiness. I’m sharing why you don’t have to change your behavior in order to feel worthy, why quitting porn in itself isn’t where your worthiness is going to come...

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Episode 86: You Are Not Your Thoughts

Uncategorized Sep 05, 2022

I recently heard a story that really stuck with me. A woman was going on a 10-day silent meditation retreat where she noticed she was thinking the same thought about what to wear the next day over and over. She decided to go on this retreat again, but this time, took just one outfit. And guess what? The same thought kept popping into her mind.

We all have habitual thoughts we think on repeat. They become cycles that play out over and over until we deliberately change the pattern or come up with a solution. The truth is you don’t have to believe your thoughts or be controlled by them, and this week, I’m showing you how to start transforming your relationship with your thoughts. 

Join me this week to discover how to recognize that you are not your thoughts. I’m showing you why we have certain thoughts that we seem to keep thinking no matter how hard we try not to, and how to start becoming an observer of your thoughts to allow more peace and self-love as you...

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Episode 85: LGBTQ+ and Porn with TJ Thomas

Uncategorized Aug 29, 2022

I get questions every now and then from people who are viewing certain types of pornography, and they have questions about what this means as far as their sexuality is concerned. So, today, I’m sitting down with TJ Thomas to answer some of these difficult questions using his personal wisdom on this topic.

TJ Thomas is a therapist who recently opened his own practice. He identifies as LGBTQ+, he’s a member of the LDS Church, and he’s here to discuss everything to do with LGBTQ+ and pornography. We discuss some of the myths out there, and I’m putting some of the questions I receive from listeners to TJ so he can give all of you his expert advice.

Tune in this week to discover new insights and perspectives around the relationship between the LGBTQ+ community, the Church, and viewing pornography. We’re discussing how religion impacted TJ’s experience of processing his sexual orientation, why pornography use doesn’t influence your sexual...

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Episode 84: Success Circle with Tina

Uncategorized Aug 22, 2022

This week, I’m sitting down with our Overcome Pornography for Good coach, Tina. If you’re in the program, you’ve been coached by her and know her well. She’s a family relationship coach who specializes in helping people find peace in difficult family relationships, and we’ve been working together in my business for a year now. 

I invited Tina to the show to talk about a concept inside our program called The Success Circle. This is a concept that is vital for creating and facilitating the change you’re after right now, and I know that Tina’s introduction of it is going to be so incredibly valuable to all of you. 

Listen in this week as Tina and I dive into a three-part concept called The Success Circle. You’ll learn what The Success Circle entails, how each element interacts with each other, and what is required of you to create incremental progress towards your goals. 

One-on-one private coaching with me will be...

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Episode 83: Top 3 Lessons from Private Coaching

Uncategorized Aug 15, 2022

I’ve worked with many private clients in my business, and I’ve also been a private client of other coaches. I’ve learned a lot from being both the coach and client, and with spots for my one-on-one private coaching opening up soon, I thought I would provide some valuable lessons from private coaching for those of you listening here. 

Whether you do eventually sign up for private coaching or not, what I’m sharing this week will help you begin shifting your experience with unwanted pornography use. So much is truly possible with a coach by your side, giving you the support, guidance, and accountability you’re looking for, and you’re hearing my top three takeaways from private coaching today.

If you’re truly sick and tired of porn controlling you, you no longer believe the narrative that you’ll have to struggle forever, or you believe you’re capable of anything, but for some reason, porn has been the one thing you can’t...

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Episode 82: Loneliness

Uncategorized Aug 08, 2022

Loneliness is something that comes up for a lot of my clients as a reason for viewing porn. They feel lonely, and they want to escape it. So, if your brain is filled with thoughts of being alone forever, that you’re not enough for someone else, and you feel shame and self-pity around these thoughts, this episode is for you.

The truth is it’s possible to feel lonely and still have more productive thoughts about your situation. Loneliness isn’t fun, but so many people make it harder for themselves by thinking thoughts that only serve to make them feel even worse. So, in this episode, I’m showing you how to change the story around your loneliness, so you don’t need to turn to pornography for company.

Tune in this week to discover how the feeling of loneliness contributes to a pornography habit. I’m sharing the impact of the thoughts you have around your loneliness, how to recognize these thoughts when they come up, and I’m showing you how to...

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Episode 81: Maybe the Problem Isn’t You

Uncategorized Aug 01, 2022

While I was on a boating vacation with my family, I decided to go out paddleboarding. I immediately started spinning around in circles, going absolutely nowhere, and no matter how hard I paddled, I was moving backward. Frustrated and deflated, I told myself I was horrible at paddleboarding and that I sucked. 

That was until I figured out the rudder on my paddleboard was on backward. And it got me thinking, how does this apply to what all of you are experiencing? Because sometimes, the problem isn’t that you just suck. Sometimes, the problem is that you need to take a look at the systems and the way you’re going about where you’re trying to get. 

Join me to discover how, maybe, the problem isn’t you if you’re struggling to quit viewing pornography. You’ll hear my revelations from my paddleboarding experience that will apply perfectly to where you are right now, and how to start shifting the focus away from you. 

 

If...

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Episode 80: Past vs. Future Focus

Uncategorized Jul 25, 2022

There are two directions we can be focused in our life: past and future. Often, what we do as humans is we look to the past for validation that we’re capable of doing something in the future. However, this only works if we’re trying to accomplish something we’ve already done. So, if you’ve never quit porn permanently before, you need to become future focused.

Focusing on the future is the secret to creating any kind of success in your life, especially with regards to quitting porn. If you’ve made it three weeks without viewing pornography in the past, you know you can make it that long, but it doesn’t give you the belief your brain needs to envision quitting permanently. But the amazing news is you don’t actually need that past evidence. 

Tune in this week to discover why quitting porn is possible, even if you’ve never made it a day without viewing porn in the past. I’m sharing how to see why your past doesn’t define...

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Episode 79: Clarifying Confusion About Buffering

Uncategorized Jul 18, 2022

This week, I’m clarifying some confusion I’ve seen around the concept of buffering. Many of you understand what buffering means and how it’s showing up for you, but it’s something I’ve coached on a few times this last week, so I knew it would be worth bringing to the podcast to share with you too. 

So, where are you going wrong with buffering? My clients understand they’re viewing pornography to escape their negative emotions. But where they get stuck is what to do next with these emotions. The question I get most often is, “Well, how can I avoid those emotions so I don’t go to porn?” And the truth is this is entirely the wrong focus. 

Listen in this week as I clarify confusion about buffering and show you where you might be going in the wrong direction with it. I’m showing you the true reason you’re experiencing unwanted porn use, what it really takes to finally quit, and where buffering falls in all...

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Episode 78: Automatic Sexual Thoughts

Uncategorized Jul 11, 2022

So, you’re out in public or you’re watching a movie, and maybe you see someone in tight clothes. All of a sudden, a sexual thought or urge pops into your mind. For so many people, the fear of having an automatic sexual thought keeps them from being around other people, whether that’s going to the beach or the gym, but there’s a better way to handle it.

Fearing automatic sexual thoughts is not a fun way to live your precious life. If you’re afraid you’ll have a reaction you don’t want, or that you’ll freak out when it happens, you’re in the right place. The truth is this is a completely normal part of our human experience, and this week, I’m showing you how to shift your experience of your automatic sexual thoughts.

Join me this week to discover my three-step process for experiencing your automatic sexual thoughts in a different way. I’m laying out the most common mistakes people make around their automatic sexual...

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