Episode 125: Belief Plan (Replay)

Uncategorized Jun 05, 2023

This week, I’m bringing you an encore of one of the first episodes I shared here on the podcast. It’s a topic that can be life-changing and I’ve been thinking deeply about it recently, so I’m revisiting it just in case you missed it or need a refresher.

A belief plan is simple in concept but requires hard work. It necessitates deep inner work that can be uncomfortable to face. However, the practice of examining your beliefs and cultivating new ones is vital when it comes to quitting habits like pornography, or any other area in your life where you desire change.

Join me on this episode to discover what a belief plan is and why it is key, not just for achieving the goal of quitting porn, but for changing your life beyond this habit. I’m offering you a belief plan exercise you can use to start the work of overcoming pornography, as well as ideas for new thoughts to cultivate.

 

If you’re ready to do this work and start practicing...

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Episode 124: Loneliness and Dating with Tammy Hill

Uncategorized May 29, 2023

Searching for the keys to navigating loneliness and cultivating healthy relationships while dealing with a pornography habit? Seeking guidance on how to disclose this part of your life to your partner?

In a society hyper-focused on flaws and imperfections, it's easy to feel disconnected and alone. These feelings often amplify in the context of dating and relationships, especially when dealing with issues like pornography use.

This episode brings you a deep-dive into this often-taboo subject, featuring insights from our esteemed guest, Tammy Hill. Tammy is a professor at BYU, an accomplished author, a skilled relationship and sex coach, and a seasoned marriage and family therapist. She's well-versed in the intricacies of managing a fulfilling love life while dealing with personal issues, and she's here to share her invaluable expertise.

Tune into our enlightening discussion as Tammy offers practical advice on overcoming loneliness and building the relationship of your dreams. She'll...

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Episode 123: The River of Misery

Uncategorized May 22, 2023

The River of Misery has been coming up a lot recently on the podcast, so in this episode, I'm diving into this topic, how we use the River of Misery in Overcome Pornography for Good, and why this concept surprisingly makes quitting porn a lot easier.

Whatever you're trying to create in your life, you're going to face challenges and difficulties, and it won't be easy. Anyone who tells you otherwise is lying. At times, it will be miserable. The River of Misery doesn't sound great. However, it's all about accepting the misery so we can start moving through it.

Tune in this week to discover why understanding the River of Misery will help you quit viewing pornography and never go back to it. I'm sharing the thoughts that make the River of Misery difficult to cross, and showing you how to see the patterns that are keeping you stuck so you can begin working on them and make it to the other side.

 

We have limited 1:1 private coaching spots opening up! Click here before May 25th...

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Episode 122: What’s Possible with James

Uncategorized May 15, 2023

In this week's episode, I speak with James, who has been a member of Overcome Pornography for Good and has been coached by Kat. Kat also joins us on this episode. James's story is a great example of how it is never too late to try something new, and what he has achieved in the program has been transformational.

James had been viewing porn on and off since he was 11 years old, which adds up to over 40 years. He had always labeled himself as an addict and had heavy thoughts around his pornography use. However, with the approach we use in Overcome Pornography for Good, everything started to change for James.

Tune in this week to discover what is possible when you stop labeling yourself as an addict. James shares the beliefs he changed around his pornography use and what it means, and dives into all the work we did in Overcome Pornography for Good that helped him quit porn and move forward with his life.

 

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Episode 121: Overwhelm

Uncategorized May 08, 2023

Overwhelm is one of those all-encompassing uncomfortable emotions that makes us feel frozen. Quitting porn requires some miserable growth periods, which means overwhelm will naturally be a part of your experience. The good news though is that overwhelm is not a problem, and it’s easier to make progress if you lean into it.

When it comes to quitting porn, sometimes, you might feel overwhelmed by the process and skills you need to learn. You might wonder how you’ll find time to do it all, or where to even begin. Maybe you notice that your porn habit is a result of trying to escape overwhelm altogether. 

To help you navigate your overwhelm, this week, I’m sharing four strategies for breaking the cycle of overwhelm. You’ll hear what typically happens if you resist overwhelm, why you’re not actually at the mercy of this emotion, and the importance of approaching learning new skills with tiny baby steps along the way.

 

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Episode 120: Relationship Spirals with Lindsay Poelman

Uncategorized May 01, 2023

There is so much pressure on both parties in a relationship when it comes to one spouse’s porn use. Women have been taught to believe something terrible about themselves if their husbands look at porn, and men equally have a specific kind of pressure society expects them to carry.

If you and your partner are committed to healing and building connection, but it seems to be putting you both in a tailspin, listen in. Lindsay Poelman is a life coach focused on helping people who are struggling with their spouse’s porn use and an expert in trauma-informed coaching, and she’s here this week to shed light on what relationship spirals mean, and how to get out of them.

Join us on this episode as Lindsay shares how relationship spirals have a lot to do with our individual conditioning. You’ll hear why we have to first understand the context of our conditioning to untangle our relationship spirals, and how you’re both allowed to create a safe space for your own...

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Episode 119: You Are the Authority

Uncategorized Apr 24, 2023

When it comes to your own healing and quitting porn, there are so many opinions, thoughts, and ways to do it that can be offered to you out there. That’s why this might be one of the most important episodes that I ever share with you.

You can be led and guided by other people in your life, whether it’s loved ones, a coach, or mentor. But the truth is no one has all the answers for you. No one is the ultimate authority of your healing, no one has your intuition, and no one else can be your savior. 

Join me this week to hear why you have everything you need inside of you to heal and quit porn for good. I’m showing you how we’re conditioned to believe the authority lives outside of us, and why it’s vital to recognize nothing and no one is above questioning.

 

If you’re ready to stop using porn for good, you need to sign up for my free upcoming training, Overcoming Porn for Good Without the Fear and Shame Tactics. You’ll learn how to...

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Episode 118: Quitting Porn at Age 75: What’s Possible with Jeff

Uncategorized Apr 17, 2023

No matter how old you are, you can quit porn. My guest today is proof that it's possible. Jeff is 75 years old and had struggled with pornography since he was 14 years old. He had tried to quit many times over the years, but none of those attempts resulted in permanent change.

Like so many of you listening, Jeff used porn as a way to escape his emotions and it led to struggles, challenges, and stress in his life and in his relationships. However, after going through my program, he can now say that he has no desire to use porn.

Tune in this week to hear Jeff’s story of using porn for over 60 years to no longer having the urge or desire to look at it. Jeff shares why his attempts to quit over the years didn’t work, how it affected his relationship with his wife, and how what he learned in the program changed everything. Jeff says he’s now free to live his life the way he wants to, and I want you to know that that freedom is possible for you too!

 

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Episode 117: Should Your Spouse Fulfill Your Sexual Needs? with Amanda Louder

Uncategorized Apr 10, 2023

Many of us have received the conditioning that men are typically the sexual ones in a relationship and that they have an insatiable sexual need that has to be satisfied. In the context of a monogamous relationship, the responsibility to fulfill that sexual need falls on the partner, but this belief often doesn’t create great results.

To dive into this topic, I’m talking to sex coach Amanda Louder. I often recommend Amanda to my clients so she is no stranger to the Overcome Pornography for Good program. She’s also the host of the Sex for Saints podcast, and she helps women learn to embrace their sexuality and love their sex life.

Listen in this week to hear why we have to reframe the belief that your spouse should fulfill your sexual needs. Amanda is sharing where this belief comes from, what you miss out on when you believe this messaging, and her top tips for what actually creates the best, most fulfilling sexual relationship.

 

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Episode 116: How to Control Your Sexual Urges

Uncategorized Apr 03, 2023

Many of us were taught to be terrified of our sexuality. It’s something we don’t talk about openly, and maybe you think of it as evil or dangerous. However, the truth is sexuality and urges are something you have, so does everyone else and they live with us forever. 

We spend our lives trying to control our sexual urges by building fences around them and hoping they stay contained. When our urges inevitably try to break through the fence, we yell, shame them, and continue to build more fences. But this isn’t the answer.

Listen in this week to discover how to control your sexual urges. I’m showing you how your sexuality can actually be your friend and companion, and why you don’t have to tame it by resorting to locking it away or hating it.

 

If you’re ready to do this work and start practicing unconditional commitment toward quitting your porn habit, sign up to work with me!

 

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